hahay

“A cup of coffee in my right hand and a cigarette on the left, drinking and puffing like I have never done it before.”

In one corner of a so called “tambayan” I sat, deeply thinking of things which imprisoned and crippled me. Things that once freed and put me up to exaltation, things that I once wished not to end. Fate was good to me, I’m pretty sure it was but is not, I hope it will.

I was lonely before, drastically. Something was missing, I was longing for something to happen which I don’t know. I tried to search what I desired. I was in the verge of breaking down. I was searching without knowing what I am really looking for. It was like a torture, tormented by destiny. I was slowly killed by my own being. Me, myself and I were having fights, a war within themselves, leave me suffering the aftermath! Or so I thought, the fight was over, ‘twas not.

For a long time I experienced unexplainable excruciating pain. As much I kept my physical side look happy and glowing. Inside me was hell. Life was unfair!

Time passed, I’ve felt no pain. No worries, no nothing. Yet, without knowing, there is fate, playing on me again. It turned my world upside down again. Trying to patch things up is as difficult or more as final exams.

I am devastated. Baffled by these feelings I could not clearly understand.

I couldn’t just explain. Who could?

I’m here in a so called “tambayan”.

“A cup of coffee in my right hand and a cigarette on the left, drinking and puffing like I have never done it before.”

family affairs..

hi! hehe.. la magawa, blog na naman..

this happened the night after me mag dance bar.. so, i was sleeping the whole day.. my mom woke me up at 8pm, asking if id want to come with her.. magpapa swimming ung friend nya.. so, ako since its been ages since nkpg swimming, go agad. lang ligo², i packed agad. sakay ng car.. dating kme sa haus ng friend ni mama ng mga 9:30.. nag ready ng stuff.. naka rating sa villa teresita by 10pm.. dami pla kasama, family nung friend ni mama.. dami food and drinks! lol.. tapos, konting ligo, kain, inom.. sleep, then ginising ako ng 1am, uwi na daw.. ready na lahat so di na ko nka ligo. direcho na sakay sa car.. pag dating sa tabunok, sakay kme taxi ni mama and her other friend.. dun ako nagbihis sa taxi. nagpa drop sa urgello, sa shop.. there was jido.. nag internet till magliwanag.. then tambay uli with jido and chua.. 'religious' na naman as always ang topic. lol. then, uwi na mga 7am..

pero pagdating ko ng haus, wasnt able to sleep agad kc nag aya si mama sa haus ni tita.. kc bday ng cuzn ko.. so go.. pag dating dun, pinagluto muna me ng breakfast while nagsimba sila.. 8am mass near the haus lang ung chappel.. pagkatapos ko magluto, kain then tulog. wala parin banlaw. wehehe.. ginising ako ng 3pm, may sinigang na naka hain.. hehe.. kain ulit.. then ligo.. then punta daw kme sa ayala.. kain ulit.. kfc.. then dating si kuya.. bago sweldo.. amazingly, binigyan ako ng P200. yes, masaya na ko nun. wehehe.. then bili plane tket si nanay.. then grocery.. hingi additional money kay mama kc bili shirt.. then sabi nya samahan nya nlang ako. i gave her the P200. tapos nka pili ng 3 freego shirts (im wearing one ryt now. lol.).. binayaran nya lahat.. wehehe.. tapos, gala ulit.. urgello.. eat ulit.. then antok na so d2 na me ngaun.. blogging.. 2log na me after this.